I bought my friend an elephant for their room.
They said “Thank you.”
I said “Don’t mention it.”
during cummies ∩(︶▽︶)∩
No cummies for you tonight kitten now straight to bed with you
(╯ಊ╰) but daddy…im so squishy…it tingles daddy..im sticky..
Use mr fluffy baby until I get home from work and maybe I’ll give you cummies
（ ´∀｀）Thank you daddy! baby cant wait for cummies!!
wHAT THE FUCK
i hate those friendships that just end for no reason you just stop talking
Bae: Babe, come over
Me: I’m playing Kim K Hollywood
Bae: My parents aren’t home
Me: I literally just got a call from Simon
Sad Fanart featuring your OTP and such hits as:
Okay but imagine:
- Peter Parker going to a fan convention as Spiderman
- Peter Parker getting compliments on his Spiderman costume
- Peter Parker entering a Spiderman Costume Contest
- Peter Parker losing said contest
- Peter Parker losing the contest to Deadpool
i think the only thing ill ever be proud of is one of my selfies being used as a emo porn site advertisement